Date

[dudelovenext]

Okay, here's the report. :)

Got home, showered, then went to pick her up. Found her place without a problem. We met and she showed me around her place a bit (she lives on the upper story of a house with her two other friends).

We went and had a great dinner. We chatted about a ton of things...I think we freaked each other out just a bit (I told her about anime, cosplaying, and listening to video game music). She has some little quirks of her own (though I honestly think I out-quirk her). We thought about going clubbing, but by the time we got to Seattle, it would've been really late. So we went back to her place, where we chatted a bit more. Was there until about midnight when I eventually left.

I'll be seeing her again sometime next week. She seemed to like me, too. :)

I talked with Dan tonight, but I just have a lot of...weird feelings that I'm not familiar with going through my mind. It's like, I think she's cool. I'm seeing where it's going. But...I don't have the "crush" feeling that I had before when I liked someone. That "passionate" feeling. I'm not sure if that's because I've been desensitized from my last big relationship, if I'm just growing even more emotionally, or what. I'm used to my feelings being spontaneous and instant; not things that I ponder and think over. I guess it's not a bad thing, it's just making me feel...yeah, weird.

Oh well, I'll dwell on it. :) But yes, had a good time and I'll be seeing her next week. Now, off to bed!

Comments

Dude!!

[picakuma.livejournal.com]

Way to go i'm glad for ya, just let it flow and all a be good.

Re: Dude!!

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

Thanks man! :) Yep, I'm trying to be mellow about it; so far so good! :)

[netharos.livejournal.com]

Sounds like it went well. =) As for becoming desensitized, I swear it does happen, but that's not necessarily a bad thing. I mean, if we always went around acting like Anakin Skywalker did with Padme, we'd be very lonely, confused people... *ahem*, anyways... I think it's a sign of real maturity and improved confidence when you cease to become just uncontrollably smitten by someone--I think it even helps you learn to appreciate who that person really is. I haven't found myself completely steam-rolled by a woman's pressence in years; I've also had much longer relationships. Don't get me wrong--I love uncontrollable passion as much as anyone--but I think age and experience inevitably factor out some of that element.

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

I think it's still a bit of a shock to me that, in some ways, I'm still niave. I guess it is better to have a girlfriend that's really a "friend" rather than someone you hopelessly worship.

Again, just weird with my romantic side and everything. But your statements about relationships lasting longer makes me feel better. :)

[thestupidguy.livejournal.com]

"I told her about anime, cosplaying, and listening to video game music"

How can she resist?

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

She couldn't! That's why we're going out again! *ROFL*

[quetz.livejournal.com]

Glad to see someone hasn't given up.

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

Never give up. :)

[quetz.livejournal.com]

I wish I were in your shoes. Optimism doesn't come naturally to me, and I'm tired of the pain.

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

I'm honestly trying to figure out how I developed mine. When I was a teenager, geez, I was just angst, angst, angst! Something I slowly developed over time.

Well, when the pain gets too much, that's what you have your friends for. :)

[quetz.livejournal.com]

And I thank you for that. You don't know how much I still owe you.

No Worries

[hentainobaka.livejournal.com]

The crush thing doesn't always happen. I have had long term girlfriends that were more "logical" choices rather than "passion" ones. It isn't always sparkles and rose petals.... :)

Re: No Worries

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

Like I replied to Joe, it's just a little shocking that it's not sparkles and rose petals. I should've realized that not every relationship will be that way...

My last major relationship I went into...well, being kind of desperate. `^_^ Didn't mean I loved her at the time any less, but I think it brought out much more dramatic feelings than might've happened otherwise.

Thoughts

[hentainobaka.livejournal.com]

I guess with me, it didn't end up working out. I really liked the person, but I don't think in the end she was right for me. I just wanted to find the right one that I went for it. She was a great person. Kind and smart. Just no spark. In the end, I am glad I have that spark with Anne. I still do. I guess you could say that spark started a fire. ;) Everything is different. Everyone is different. Just go with your heart and you should be fine. :)

Re: No Worries

[fearless-son.livejournal.com]

Frankly, I do not see how people can base relationships off of "passion" rather than by being "logical". I think that basing a relationship off something so vague and seemingly random is tempting fate and risking someone else's feelings in addition to your own.

Re: No Worries

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

Just most people are the opposite of that. Passion may be a gamble...but I think people like to gamble. :)

[namastegiggles.livejournal.com]

Just have fun. *hugs* That feeling may develop over time. Who knows? Go find out.

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

One thing that makes me very nervous about dating is one of us developing emotions while the other doesn't. I know that's just a gamble you take when you're dating...but still makes me nervous. `^_^

Yeah, I'm totally giving it a chance. :)

[hencucco.livejournal.com]

*wonders if she is your only married friend*

The only relationship that I didn't have instant twitterpation and all that with is the one that I still have. It helps to get to know the person a little more in reality before all of the hearts popping around your head blind you to their faults and things that would make you incompatible. The fluttering stomach and feelings that you can't stand to be away from them should come :) Its nice to feel that twitterpation for someone more for who they actually are than just a few silly things like their appearance and that sexy look they just flashed you. Twitterpation based on more than that is able to last longer, and even develop into True Love :)

Take it in stride bro :) I don't think you should feel discouraged about that at all.

<3

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

Mmmmm...let's see...I have a divorced friend...and later this year a bunch of my friends are getting married...wow, you might just be. `^_^

Yeah, I know that that instant physical attraction does not a good relationship make.

Thanks though. :) I'll just...keep on going and see what happens!

[devilslayer.livejournal.com]

rock rock on man ^_^ hopoe all works out for you

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Dante. :)

[justawave.livejournal.com]

Hey, guess it's pretty early in your experience still - but cool! I agree with folks up above... seems like relationships happen in all different kinds of ways so good that you are having something different going on this time!

Nate and I were not instantaneous lightning and crush crush crush... actually our relationship was totally topsy turvy for four months before things settled down.

:)

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

Aw, that's awesome! :)

Yeah, I'm giving this a chance. Still weird without that "crush" feeling...but yeah, let's see what happens. :)

[fearless-son.livejournal.com]

I think that my experience has been the opposite of yours. I never get that "crush" feeling. With me, it is always "She's cool and we work together." Indeed, emotions are something that very rarely come to me quickly. Usually my emotions are developed after the fact, when I think over my experiences.

The crush/passion feelings are probably the one thing that has wrecked most of the potential relationships that I could have had. More precisely, the lack of those feelings are what close those doors. There are plenty of girls that I think are cool, that I think I would be compatible with, who think that I am a great guy and they would love to have a boyfriend like me, but... they just never have those undefinable feelings for me that they get on guys that they would rather be with.

I am really starting to hate crush feelings. -_-*

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

I think you need to find someone with a similar mindset. You have such a unique mindset in that respect.

But yes, I think that "crush" feeling can help build a romantic connection.

"Undefinable"?

[fearless-son.livejournal.com]

"Unique" is certainly a word that describes it. Even other people with AS typically have mindsets that are closer to "normal" in that regard than I do.

As for the crush, I dislike the idea of instant crushes. I want to spend some time with someone, get to know her, and gradually realize that I really care about her in that certain way. Somehow, growing a relationship like a blooming flower seems more "romantic" to me than "love at first sight."

Yes, "undefinable." I have asked girls to describe it for me. None of them has ever been able to in any meaningful way. Either one has it or one does not, and if one does not there is nothing one can do to get it. It is like you have to be born to be crushed on by any given girl. Frankly, I find that a little unfair.

[dudelovenext.livejournal.com]

I honestly think it's a "quality"...whether it's a certain amount of smoothness or charm...maybe "charm" is the best word. You can do things to enchance it, but if you don't have it, it's a very hard skill to learn.